I’ve been more or less in a deep freeze for the past two months. Has it been this cold for this long in recent winters? Maybe it’s because I’m now living in a house without central heat (!), but I’m feeling it more this year, and am loathe to do anything but huddle beneath the blankets, cuddle with the cats and the space heaters, and mash the F5 button on my laptop for the latest election results/news. I keep telling myself I’ll go on bike rides and work out and chop some wood, just as soon as the temperature rises back to a respectable above-freezing. Someday.

Speaking of coldness, I found out yesterday that my state legislators are attempting to get rid of my city’s domestic registry. For those of you who don’t know what a domestic registry is, it is basically a policy that lets same-sex couples go down to the town hall, pay seventy-five bucks, write their names on a list, and maybe get a shiny certificate with stars on it or something. There are no rights, privileges, or anything remotely resembling marriage involved (except that you can’t have more than one domestic partner, and you can’t domestically partner with your cousin or siblings. In a way, it’s probably more restrictive to sexuality than not registering). Since it’s a Lawrence-specific registry, only people in Lawrence can participate, and no one outside of Lawrence is obligated to recognize the registry. So why, then, is there a concerted effort on the part of lawmakers like Rep. Lance Kinzer, R-Olathe, to outlaw this policy?

The simple, logical, and in fact only answer is this: they’re dickheads.

For serious. There is no reason, none whatsoever, to pursue this piece of legislation, that is not grounded in utter dickheadedness. You believe marriage is between a man and a woman? Fine, but that’s another argument altogether, since this isn’t even marriage we’re talking about here. Lawrence’s domestic registry is the most ineffectual symbolic gesture that a liberal city, surrounded by the Phelpses and likeminded, could give to its LGBT inhabitants. At the time it was passed, many of us thought that the city could go even further. Like maybe handing out a gift basket with the registration, or a free coupon for Perkins. Anything to make it worth the trouble.

But evidently in other parts of Kansas, enough straight couples are laying awake at night, their marriages in mortal danger of crumbling to pieces, because some wicked gays in Lawrence signed a piece of paper. Let’s be sure to thank Rep. Kinzer, and his colleagues Rep. Anthony Brown, R-Eudora, and Rep. Lee Tafanelli, R-Ozawkie, for standing up for these good-hearted folk. Amidst economic fears, insurance crises and public school financing issues, I am happy that these noble legislators are focusing on what is truly important.